Thursday, April 18, 2013

Which Way is Up??

Which way is up? Do you ever feel that way? I do, and I am right now.
A stormy reflection on the way into work this morning: Which way is up?

First, let me start by saying I loooove what I do and I choose what I do. That doesn’t mean that it’s always easy though. Right now, as I get closer to my first photoshoot (9 more days!) and my first competition of the season (17 more days!), I am starting to get overwhelmed. The funny thing is, for the most part, it’s not ‘bad’ things stressing me out, it’s good, positive things- just so many of them! Again, I am excited about what I am doing and can’t wait for these experiences, but right now, there are just so many things going on and such little time. Lately, I have been feeling like all I am doing is planning and prepping for the next thing, and never actually ‘experiencing’ the thing. Hahaha. I know this is what it gets like closer to the show. Training-wise and food plan-wise, I can keep up. I expect that and I love that. Beast mode on! On the mental state-wise front, things can start to get overwhelming.
While I knew that this process would be a test of mental strength (commitment and willpower being the two big ones), I didn’t realize just how important the mental aspect of training and competing would be. When I start getting overwhelmed, I know I start getting grumpy and withdraw (my poor husband!) and then I start questioning what I’m even doing, which eventually leads to the, “Why am I even doing this in the first place??” Which then makes me pause and reflect. Why am I doing this?

As I shared on my What’s This All About page, I don’t do this to win. I do this to learn, to grow and to become a better me. Experiencing all of these feelings and emotions, whether they are positive or exhausting, is all a part of that process. Every challenge is an opportunity to do my best and become better. Taking this time to step back and reframe how I experience what’s coming at me gives me that strength and determination to push through and bring my best. Nobody said this was going to be easy, but it will be worth it. Let's do this!


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